Well we lost a good one tonight, our boy MercerBears

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told yall my shite was 4 minnits behind i like the pigs

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told yall my shite was 4 minnits behind i like the pigs

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last week me and my cousin from oxford was goin to a weldin convention in texas and decide to stop in louisiana to eat food

as we drivin theres shite ton of boodan signs
now i dont really frick with the boodan or lil ceesars but my cousin clannsmyne tell me that they got cracklin but we gotta wait a hour at a bar till they open so i said ok cause he always pay for beer and the sign say they got fans and clapper lights in the bathrooms

we go in to a bar and sit down by some girls who look good enough and start talkin and then 15 min later out woddle there friend from the shitter

thick 6 footer she approach us in slow mo starin at my cousin and my dick could sense she the cock block mutumbo

i didn’t want none of that so i stand up when she get to the table cause im polite then go out to the truck to get my cigs

when i come back my cousin and ole girl was gone and the other girls was gigglin and say they went in the girl bathroom so i figure i let him get his nut cause he never get no pussy 30 minutes pass they still in there so i tell the girls they gotta call there friend cause we gotta go but they say u dont get her when she busy and i say bs and head over to get them as i approach the door i could hear them cheeks gettin clapped and notice the light from under the door crack flickerin on off like a siezure rave

i nock the door but the lights keep flickerin so i jimmy it open and get my phone camera to capture my cousin winnin his 4h contest above the stall door i seen a hand grab up and stop the squeakin fan one more clap and it all go black.

i start back peddlin and the light flicker on. im shook.

what i seen when she step out confirm what i told yall bout people from Oxford that hoe done hit him with a strap on. cansensually.

drivin back alone i get guilty cause i seen 42 bill boards that say blessed is the merciful 888-8888 so i call and ask for help

they ask if i been rear ended and i say no but my cousin did so i send them my cousin number

i got tf outta louisiana.

clannsmyne got his boodan.

im not ever goin back to louisiana again.

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Oxford bad experience again


so last time i get sent there for work over week end me and ole boy workin bar get to be pretty cool until i find weird porns on his phone that was not hetero sexual films which i never seen before cause im not gay i sell propane

come this week end my boss tell me i gotta go back up there for work so i say fool me 1 time and head on up against better jugement i agree

my new girl from batesvilles been tellin me i need to go see her figured id get 2 birds stoned at once so we hit up chillys friday and i order the meat queso and southern mexican rolls and watch her eat them with napkin in lap. yall prolly been there but after u dated for a bit alot started changin when she get to comfy. come saturday i go to exit off 55 and call her askin to see what she want to eat.

said she dont care. she never care legedlly.

so i start pickin for her and she start sayin ew no so i hang up then hit up krystle burger for sliders. new years promise was not to eat before gettin home so i only sip the sprite.

when i get to her house she say wheres my food i say you didnt want none. once my sprites gone i realize she been gone 5 min after that and i leave my krystles in the front seat cause i only remembered the sprite cause jesus.

i go down to the yard and see her eatin all my krystles tryin to act innocent with a pickles on her tittys but i didnt say shite cause i wanted some arse


so now we cuddlin up im hungriern shite watchin play offs when her ex text her. i never met em before and she start talkin bout em.

i had to ask if he fricked. He did. before she continues the little krystles had her fricked up. 42 minutes later she calls me sayin comode wont flush. i come in and find some frickery.

girl shits not suppose to be biggern febrese bottles. so tryin to unclog it i ask if his dicks biggern mine.

im confident.

she calmly point down sayin its bout size of the size of her shite.

i start thinkin bout all my exs and drop the plunger. got in my truck then got on out. she been gettin four arm dick. never goin back to oxford.

harold and kumar didnt go to krystles for this and neither did i.

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pigs gonna win u got my word are I ban my name

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