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Now that everyone has a coach, hottest coach power rankings
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:44 am
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:44 am
Let's face it boys, this isn't the SEC of old when we had hunks like Richt, Lane and Meyer prowling the sidelines. As the coaching quality of the SEC has dipped so has its frickability. Nevertheless after a wild coaching carousel it's time to take stock of what our respective programs are working with
1. Nick Saban
GOAT in more ways than one. His looks, like his coaching acumen, have aged like a fine wine.
2. Derek Mason
With the departure of Kevin Sumlin he's our lone chocolate thunder. I know what you're thinking, ok face but that rockin bod makes up for it.
3. Jimbo Fisher
Jimbo's in that weird space where I can't decide if he's a young or old 52. Regardless he's at his best rocking the cap and dad glasses to hide the thinning hair and crow's feet. Let's re-evaluate when the season starts, but don't let this high ranking fool you. We don't have much to work with this year
4. Will Muschamp
Let's state the obvious, the face isn't great. However, bravo to Will for rocking the all black that cleverly masks the dad bod lurking underneath. And would it kill the man to tan a little?
5. Dan Mullen
Yes, the hunchbacked bug eyed Cousin Eddie doppleganger is #5 on my list. WE ARE STARVING FOR REAL TALENT. Muffin at least keeps himself well groomed and looks surprisingly chipper for a man who hasn't slept since Thanksgiving
6. Matt Luke
Hard to get a read on this one. Odd face, bug eyes and the frat swoop isn't helping him much.
7. Mark Stoops
Not much to say about this one. He's plain enough to not be offensive I guess, but too boring to really make an impact. Maybe the best looking Stoops bro if that's worth anything (it isn't).
8. Joe Moorehead
Here is where we start to get into the real oddities. Silver fox is always a winning look, but goddamn Joe the double chin has got to go!
9. Kirby Smart
Butter teeth, SuperCuts 'do. There's some real potential here but Kirby is putting forth the bare minimum effort. And WTF kinda name is Kirby?
10. Chad Morris
Honestly not awful for a guy almost 50. That's the nicest thing I can think to say.
11. Gus Malzahn
Gross. Nerd glasses, frowny disposition, bitch tits. This guy is just a vomit all around. He at least still mostly resembles a human, but he is approaching creature territory like our last three.
12. Ed Orgeron
Yeah I know, face like the WAT lady. Keeps himself in shape and can make a good gumbo, that counts for something.
13. Jeremy Pruitt
Conehead
14. Barry Odom
Solid bod with a nightmare face. Don't leave home without a ballcap Barry
1. Nick Saban
GOAT in more ways than one. His looks, like his coaching acumen, have aged like a fine wine.
2. Derek Mason
With the departure of Kevin Sumlin he's our lone chocolate thunder. I know what you're thinking, ok face but that rockin bod makes up for it.
3. Jimbo Fisher
Jimbo's in that weird space where I can't decide if he's a young or old 52. Regardless he's at his best rocking the cap and dad glasses to hide the thinning hair and crow's feet. Let's re-evaluate when the season starts, but don't let this high ranking fool you. We don't have much to work with this year
4. Will Muschamp
Let's state the obvious, the face isn't great. However, bravo to Will for rocking the all black that cleverly masks the dad bod lurking underneath. And would it kill the man to tan a little?
5. Dan Mullen
Yes, the hunchbacked bug eyed Cousin Eddie doppleganger is #5 on my list. WE ARE STARVING FOR REAL TALENT. Muffin at least keeps himself well groomed and looks surprisingly chipper for a man who hasn't slept since Thanksgiving
6. Matt Luke
Hard to get a read on this one. Odd face, bug eyes and the frat swoop isn't helping him much.
7. Mark Stoops
Not much to say about this one. He's plain enough to not be offensive I guess, but too boring to really make an impact. Maybe the best looking Stoops bro if that's worth anything (it isn't).
8. Joe Moorehead
Here is where we start to get into the real oddities. Silver fox is always a winning look, but goddamn Joe the double chin has got to go!
9. Kirby Smart
Butter teeth, SuperCuts 'do. There's some real potential here but Kirby is putting forth the bare minimum effort. And WTF kinda name is Kirby?
10. Chad Morris
Honestly not awful for a guy almost 50. That's the nicest thing I can think to say.
11. Gus Malzahn
Gross. Nerd glasses, frowny disposition, bitch tits. This guy is just a vomit all around. He at least still mostly resembles a human, but he is approaching creature territory like our last three.
12. Ed Orgeron
Yeah I know, face like the WAT lady. Keeps himself in shape and can make a good gumbo, that counts for something.
13. Jeremy Pruitt
Conehead
14. Barry Odom
Solid bod with a nightmare face. Don't leave home without a ballcap Barry
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:48 am to craigbiggio
That picture of Ed is awesome!!
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:49 am to craigbiggio
Well it's obvious you're not gay.
Aside from Nick and maybe Derek - your list is
Btw- I'd already thought out a our coach is hotter than your coach thread when I thought it might be Norvell.
And our new coach is kinda cute- I'd have him fake an accent and pretend to be Gordon Ramsey.
Aside from Nick and maybe Derek - your list is
Btw- I'd already thought out a our coach is hotter than your coach thread when I thought it might be Norvell.
And our new coach is kinda cute- I'd have him fake an accent and pretend to be Gordon Ramsey.
This post was edited on 12/7/17 at 9:52 am
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:50 am to piggilicious
quote:
Aside from Nick and maybe Derek - your list is
pigg look what I had to work with
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:51 am to craigbiggio
Jimbo at 3? He looks like a guy that would be yelling at his son’s T-ball coach
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:52 am to craigbiggio
quote:
pigg look what I had to work with
true
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:56 am to Dawgholio
quote:
Jimbo at 3? He looks like a guy that would be yelling at his son’s T-ball coach
Anyone of that group at 3 is a travesty
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:57 am to piggilicious
You really thought hard about this didn't you. Admit it, you've fantasized about many of these men.
Posted on 12/7/17 at 9:58 am to piggilicious
quote:
And our new coach is kinda cute- I'd have him fake an accent and pretend to be Gordon Ramsey
Posted on 12/7/17 at 10:00 am to HTDawg
quote:
You really thought hard about this didn't you.
Very hard. One might even describe it as rock hard
Posted on 12/7/17 at 10:01 am to craigbiggio
Jimbo way too high
Orgeron at least works out
Orgeron at least works out
Posted on 12/7/17 at 10:01 am to craigbiggio
quote:
13. Jeremy Pruitt - Conehead
Posted on 12/7/17 at 10:02 am to craigbiggio
That dude at number 8 is a legitimate ogre. How can he be 8? I wouldn't even hold his hand.
Posted on 12/7/17 at 10:05 am to craigbiggio
quote:
1. Nick Saban
GOAT in more ways than one. His looks, like his coaching acumen, have aged like a fine wine.
A chiseled jaw with an air of confidence. Oh yea, Miss Terry likey.
Posted on 12/7/17 at 2:54 pm to SummerOfGeorge
quote:
A chiseled jaw with an air of confidence. Oh yea, Miss Terry likey.
Candi Edwards approved too
Posted on 12/7/17 at 2:58 pm to craigbiggio
We have the fattest coach now...... Arkansas is off the hook
Posted on 12/7/17 at 3:47 pm to craigbiggio
Ed would beat all them baws arse
Posted on 12/7/17 at 3:49 pm to craigbiggio
This a very weird post especially from a man
Posted on 12/7/17 at 3:50 pm to craigbiggio
Moorhead looks like Dan Mullen and Matt Luke had a baby together.
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