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SEC Application Questions
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:33 am
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:33 am
these are compiled from twitter, which are great. feel free to add to the list...
1.What year did your state secede from the union?
2.Is the most convenient place for your fan base to view your BCS title trophy the local Wal Mart?
3.If Trooper Taylor has $80,000 and five offensive linemen, how much can he give to each player?
4.Do any of your players have first names such as Hunter, Taylor, Trey, Cade, John Michael, John Parker or Rowdy?
5.Have you ever parked your RV on a rival's campus...on Tuesday?
6.If Cecil is willing to give you a $20k discount to let Cam play for $180k, what are the chances he played at Auburn for free?
7.Has your star player told a b-tch it was 'time to die', then played a few weeks later?
8.Is the “12th Man” another name for “bagman”?
9.Have you been to Athens and Oxford but never been to Europe?
10.Does your fan base have expert level knowledge of FlightAware?
11.Are you comfortable with Gary Danielson trolling America on your behalf?
12.Do you have a source in the FBI or NCAA that can confirm your rival is cheating?
13.How many * are in your record book?
14.Do you have Oklahoma's phone number?
15.Does your backup quarterback have bangs?
16.Has Charles Robinson visited your campus within the last 6 months?
17.Who is your bagman?
18.Who won last year’s Stanley Cup? (“What the hell is the Stanley Cup” is the only acceptable answer)
19.Why does your school display a hand sign to opponents that is not the middle finger?
20.What fried food is your school famous for?
21.Is Waffle House a food group?
22.Do you prefer Golden Flake or Lays?
23.How do you like cowbells?
24.How many campus streets are named after sports heros? How many of them were fired or sanctioned?
25.Does your fan base wear Jorts?
26.Have any of your players used a Prius to rob someone at a gas pump owned by your richest booster?
27.Do you call Paul Finebaum when you need counseling?
28.Do you currently have a freshman running back on your roster who you consider to be "The Next Herschel?"
29.Essay: Discuss how Tebow won the Heisman while Manning didn't, without using the word "wanker".
30.Peyton Manning was: (a) Robbed. (b) Cheated. (c) Still better than Woodson. (d) All of the above.
1.What year did your state secede from the union?
2.Is the most convenient place for your fan base to view your BCS title trophy the local Wal Mart?
3.If Trooper Taylor has $80,000 and five offensive linemen, how much can he give to each player?
4.Do any of your players have first names such as Hunter, Taylor, Trey, Cade, John Michael, John Parker or Rowdy?
5.Have you ever parked your RV on a rival's campus...on Tuesday?
6.If Cecil is willing to give you a $20k discount to let Cam play for $180k, what are the chances he played at Auburn for free?
7.Has your star player told a b-tch it was 'time to die', then played a few weeks later?
8.Is the “12th Man” another name for “bagman”?
9.Have you been to Athens and Oxford but never been to Europe?
10.Does your fan base have expert level knowledge of FlightAware?
11.Are you comfortable with Gary Danielson trolling America on your behalf?
12.Do you have a source in the FBI or NCAA that can confirm your rival is cheating?
13.How many * are in your record book?
14.Do you have Oklahoma's phone number?
15.Does your backup quarterback have bangs?
16.Has Charles Robinson visited your campus within the last 6 months?
17.Who is your bagman?
18.Who won last year’s Stanley Cup? (“What the hell is the Stanley Cup” is the only acceptable answer)
19.Why does your school display a hand sign to opponents that is not the middle finger?
20.What fried food is your school famous for?
21.Is Waffle House a food group?
22.Do you prefer Golden Flake or Lays?
23.How do you like cowbells?
24.How many campus streets are named after sports heros? How many of them were fired or sanctioned?
25.Does your fan base wear Jorts?
26.Have any of your players used a Prius to rob someone at a gas pump owned by your richest booster?
27.Do you call Paul Finebaum when you need counseling?
28.Do you currently have a freshman running back on your roster who you consider to be "The Next Herschel?"
29.Essay: Discuss how Tebow won the Heisman while Manning didn't, without using the word "wanker".
30.Peyton Manning was: (a) Robbed. (b) Cheated. (c) Still better than Woodson. (d) All of the above.
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:34 am to winyahpercy
31.Is your first name a last name?
32.How much longer before Bobby Lowder gets indicted for costing the American taxpayers $3 billion?
33.How do you feel about beautiful coeds in black sun dresses yelling "Cocks"?
34.How much money, hypothetically, would you have offered Cam Newton?
35.How much experience do you have with herbicides and pesticides?
36.How much dirt can you dig up on your rival and how fast can you get that information to the NCAA?
37.Does your town have more Waffle Houses than Starbucks?
38.Did Bandit & the Snowman have to drive through your state to get the Coors for Big Enos?
39.Even though Reveille would be the SEC’s only true bitch, how would she defeat Uga, Bully and Smokey in a Battle Royale? Assume it’s a late fall cage match so she can’t use her speed nor will the opponents die of heat stroke.
40.Red eye or sawmill gravy?
41.Do you have a water polo or field hockey team? (If yes, the ends your application and we’ll be in touch. If no, proceed to next question.)
42.Which do you find more representative of your university: Colonel Sanders or The Rothschilds?
43.How many national championships do you want to celebrate?
44.Does your school Love the Lord enough to pay for new churches if your players parents happen to be in ministry?
45.Is ‘barbeque’ a noun or verb?
46.What is a "hokie"? (test question for future application)
47.Have you ever had a lawyer research loopholes in your school's tailgating rules.
48.Is your stadium the 5th largest 'city' in the state 8 Saturdays in the fall?
49. Are you okay with the commissioner throwing you under the bus to cover up a pay to play?
50.Can you spell Mississippi? (don't worry, neither can we)
51.Can you correctly identify a piece of YellaWood?
52.Bourbon is to the SEC as milk is to (a) Babies, (b) The Big Ten, (c) The ACC, (d) All of the above
53.Does your stadium become the second-largest city.... during the spring football game?
54.Does your school's Greek system have more members than an average D-III school's student body?
55.Can you insult fellow conference members w/ burning hate yet find the will to chant "SEC" after beating an ACC team?
56.The SEC's greatest Heisman Trophy winner is (a) Danny Wuerffel, (b) Tim Tebow, (c) Cam Newton or (d) Forrest Gump.
57.How do you really feel about Golden Flake and Texas Pete?
58.Have you ever lost a bowl game to Ohio State?
59.Fill in the blank: The War of ____ Aggression
60.Texans have seemed to forgotten how fellow southern states bailed their arse out after the Alamo fiasco, will A&M ever forget that we bailed them out of the Big 12?
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:34 am to winyahpercy
Most of those are completely nf
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:38 am to winyahpercy
Might be worth reading if we could narrow it down to a top 20, because some of those are funny but there are entirely too many of them.
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:39 am to winyahpercy
mediocre at best. a lot of those things are very university specific.
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:39 am to winyahpercy
quote:
38.Did Bandit & the Snowman have to drive through your state to get the Coors for Big Enos?
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:40 am to winyahpercy
quote:
winyahpercy
You forgot a question about what you are going to do when they lock the ATPB.
I guess your answer is start this thread
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:42 am to winyahpercy
quote:
58.Have you ever lost a bowl game to Ohio State?
Ummmmm.....
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:42 am to Hubbhogg
quote:
Hubbhogg
quote:
Georgia Fan
welcome to the good side
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:44 am to Damn Good Dawg
I hope you fricking destroy Boise
Posted on 8/30/11 at 11:59 am to Damn Good Dawg
Kentucky is out on question #1.
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