Good day to revisit MercerBears' trips to Oxford & the ensuing hilarity

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Posted by MercerBears

Oxford bad experience last week end

never again am i gonna go back to that place.

so i get sent there for work over week end so end up goin to same bar every nite just to pass the time so me and ole boy workin bar get to be pretty cool.

we start doin draft kings but my cell screens cracked up so i use his to do my picks when he start talkin bout his problems with his girl that she dont satisfy him any more and says she went to aggies but now over seas for the army.

after ten min ramblin like a parett he gets a video call on his i pad from her so he goes to the back to talk which is good i know its hard to be real far away from people u love but 1 hr past and he still back there and his cell chargin on the bar so i use it to check pelican score cause my cell screens cracked up.

i go to google and type in p for pelican and shite ton porn book marks go everywere so i start snoopin to see what this guy really like since he the one makin all my drinks.

come to find he into weird shite i never seen when they put there meat in a hole in the wall but im not picky with porns so i slide to corner of bar and fast forward little bit and see arse gettin munch on so i rewind back a little.

they was both men.

ole boy girls over sea fightin isis while he servin drinks with hands after beatin his meat to non hetero sexual films.

i payed then left quiet and thank god for watchin over me cause brook lopez end up droppin 33 winnin me 30 bucks but this the kind of shits goin on up in oxford just to warn yall.

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Posted by MercerBears

Oxford bad experience last week end again

Oxford bad experience again

so last time i get sent there for work over week end me and ole boy workin bar get to be pretty cool until i find weird porns on his phone that was not hetero sexual films which i never seen before cause im not gay i sell propane

come this week end my boss tell me i gotta go back up there for work so i say fool me 1 time and head on up against better jugement i agree

my new girl from batesvilles been tellin me i need to go see her figured id get 2 birds stoned at once so we hit up chillys friday and i order the meat queso and southern mexican rolls and watch her eat them with napkin in lap. yall prolly been there but after u dated for a bit alot started changin when she get to comfy. come saturday i go to exit off 55 and call her askin to see what she want to eat.

said she dont care. she never care legedlly.

so i start pickin for her and she start sayin ew no so i hang up then hit up krystle burger for sliders. new years promise was not to eat before gettin home so i only sip the sprite.

when i get to her house she say wheres my food i say you didnt want none. once my sprites gone i realize she been gone 5 min after that and i leave my krystles in the front seat cause i only remembered the sprite cause jesus.

i go down to the yard and see her eatin all my krystles tryin to act innocent with a pickles on her tittys but i didnt say shite cause i wanted some arse


so now we cuddlin up im hungriern shite watchin play offs when her ex text her. i never met em before and she start talkin bout em.

i had to ask if he fricked. He did. before she continues the little krystles had her fricked up. 42 minutes later she calls me sayin comode wont flush. i come in and find some frickery.

girl shits not suppose to be biggern febrese bottles. so tryin to unclog it i ask if his dicks biggern mine.

im confident.

she calmly point down sayin its bout size of the size of her shite.

i start thinkin bout all my exs and drop the plunger. got in my truck then got on out. she been gettin four arm dick. never goin back to oxford.

harold and kumar didnt go to krystles for this and neither did i.

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