"The Devil Went Down To Texas"

Stolen from reddit, on mobile so copy and paste as is. Hence the all caps.

SIAP


"THE DEVIL WENT DOWN TO TEXAS"

NICK SABAN WENT DOWN TO TEXAS, HE WAS LOOKIN' FOR REVENGE

HE WAS IN A BIND 'CAUSE HE HAD FELL BEHIND, HE WAS WANTING TO AVENGE

WHEN HE CAME ACROSS THIS YOUNG MAN PLAYIN' SOME FOOTBALL AND THROWIN' IT HOT.

AND NICK SABAN JUMPED UP IN KYLE FIELD AND SAID  "BOY, LET ME TELL YOU WHAT."

 "I BET YOU DIDN'T KNOW IT, BUT I'VE GOT BALL PLAYERS, TOO.

AND IF YOU'D CARE TO TAKE A DARE I'LL MAKE A BET WITH YOU.

NOW YOU PLAY PRETTY GOOD FOOTBALL BOY, BUT GIVE ALABAMA THEIR DUE.

I'LL BET A CRYSTAL BALL AGAINST YOUR TEAM, CAUSE I THINK WE'RE BETTER THAN YOU."

THE BOY SAID,  "MY NAME'S JOHNNY, AND IT MIGHT BE A SIN,

BUT WE'LL TAKE YOUR BET; AND YOU'RE GONNA REGRET 'CAUSE WE'RE THE BEST THERE'S EVER BEEN!"

JOHNNY, THROW ON UP YOUR PADS AND SHOW YOUR AGGIE PRIDE.

'CAUSE HELL'S BROKE LOOSE IN TEXAS AND NICK SABAN HAS THE TIDE.

AND IF YOU WIN YOU GET THIS SHINY FOOTBALL MADE OF GLASS,

BUT IF YOU LOSE THE TIDE WILL KICK YOUR arse!

NICK SABAN SUMMONED UP HIS TEAM AND HE SAID,  "WE'LL START THIS SHOW."

AND FIRE CAME FROM AJ'S ARMS AS HE STARTED UP HIS THROW.

AND HE HANDED THE BALL TO YELDON AND HE MADE A TOUCHDOWN.

AND THE TEAM CELEBRATED AS THEY LOOKED FORWARD TO THEIR CROWN.

WHEN THE TIDE HAD SCORED, JOHNNY SAID,  "WELL, Y'ALL ARE GOOD ON THE RUN,

BUT GET DOWN IN THAT TRENCH RIGHT THERE AND LET ME SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE."

12TH MAN CHEERING ON IN AGGIELAND!

COACH SUMLIN'S READY WITH HIS BEST GAME PLAN;

MIKE EVANS DOWNFIELD PUTTING ON A SHOW.

CAN THE TIDE STOP JOHNNY? NO, CHILD, NO.

NICK SABAN SHOOK HIS HAND BECAUSE HE KNEW THAT HE'D BEEN BEAT.

AND HE LAID THAT CRYSTAL BALL ON THE GROUND AT JOHNNY'S FEET.

JOHNNY SAID,  "TIDE, JUST COME ON BACK IF YOU EVER WANNA LOSE THE BRAWL,

'CAUSE I SHOWED YOU ONCE--YOU SON OF A BITCH--I'M JOHNNY frickING FOOTBALL"