The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban | SECRant.com
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GoBigOrange86
Tennessee Fan
Lowcountry, The South, USA
Member since Jun 2008
13571 posts

The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban



Let's face facts. These are two of the best, if not the two best, coaches in the country. The good folk of Gainesville crow about how Meyer's 2 national titles in 3 years place him among the GOAT, while the mulleted misfits of Tuscaloosa point to Saban's program-building ability and extraordinary defensive mind.

I struggle when I look at these two as to who to pull for in the SEC Championship Game. Both are clearly fairly smug and self-assured (and for good reason). Both have earned reputations, deserved or not, as liars. And both are winners.

But for me, I give the nod to Saban. Why?

Because Urban Meyer is evil.

Pure, unadulterated evil.

I am convinced his true form is that of a serpent with 3 heads. I believe that Tim Tebow is a kind soul, but the only way he can actually say and believe the praise he heaps upon his head coach, he is under some kind of powerful enchantment, likely a spell that can only be cast with copious amounts of the blood of baby seals.

Nick Saban, on the other hand, is arrogant, but he's arrogant in the sense that I think he takes himself as a fine patron of the arts, a man with excellent taste in wine, and a person with a good eye for interior design.

Urban Meyer is arrogant because of his evil, seemingly limitless power. He is Emperor Palpatine, corrupting the souls of the good and just to do his bidding. Saban is Donald Trump...slightly annoying, clearly dying his hair, but a savvy leader of men. He need not rely on any spellcraft.

I give the nod to Saban, then, because while it's debatable who is the better coach of the two, it is not debatable who has the monopoly on evil.

Look upon Urban Meyer and despair.







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LSUtoOmaha
LSU Fan
Nashville
Member since Apr 2004
21215 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban








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geauxtigahs87
LSU Fan
Vilseck, Germany
Member since Dec 2008
16703 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban








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Robot Santa
SMU Fan
TeamWalt
Member since Oct 2009
31234 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban


UF fans: You don't know Urban. He does charity work and he shook my hand one time. He's a great guy and in no way a giant prick who needs a large helping of humble pie.

LSU fans: Saban is Satan. His name is actually just a poorly thought out pseudonym, we swear.

Bama fans: Saban walks on water and his tears cure AIDS. Too bad he never cries!






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SEC Ranter
Alabama Fan
Member since Oct 2009
1348 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban




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jimmy the leg
LSU Fan
under an interstate overpass - DAMN
Member since Aug 2007
933 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban


I hear he cries in his sleep. He wishes he was taller!





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Teague
Alabama Fan
Huntsville, AL
Member since Aug 2007
11004 posts
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re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban


Makes sense to me.





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SEC Ranter
Alabama Fan
Member since Oct 2009
1348 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban


The Dark Side will rule again!





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Tolbert1906
Florida Fan
Member since Aug 2009
820 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban


quote:

Urban Meyer is arrogant because of his evil, seemingly limitless power. He is Emperor Palpatine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-xPSxMA580






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Tide
Alabama Fan
Member since Jul 2009
436 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban


LINK: Mescaline

The effective dose for mescaline is 200–500 mg, equivalent to about 5 g of dried peyote. The effects last about 10 to 12 hours. When combined with appropriate set and setting, peyote is reported to trigger states of deep introspection and insight that have been described as being of a metaphysical or spiritual nature. At times, these can be accompanied by rich visual or auditory effects...



This post was edited on 11/29 at 10:11 pm


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genuineLSUtiger
LSU Fan
Asheville, NC
Member since Sep 2005
36315 posts

re: The head coach matchup: Urban Meyer vs. Nick Saban


quote:

I struggle when I look at these two as to who to pull for in the SEC Championship Game


Yeah, this has to be especially hard for Vol fans considering these are their two biggest rivals. Most fans up here that I have talked to are finding themselves between a rock and hard place with regards to whom to pull for. I liked the post. Good work.






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