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CNB beverage spinoff thread : the SEC and the real truth about southern beverage
Posted on 6/4/15 at 10:18 pm
Posted on 6/4/15 at 10:18 pm
coke - what you snort off your GF's belly
bourbon - what you shoot out of her navel
tequila - what you shoot out of her navel after licking squeezed limes off her chest
This is the only correct combination of bourbon and coke!
Bourbon was created to stand on it's own. It was not until until Prohibition that mixed drinks became the rage. This was due to real distilleries being shut down and the replacement booze being so bad you had to mix it with something to get it down your throat.
As for those saying snorting coke is a bad thing, yet drink Coke Cola, you are unaware of the past. In the early days, Coke had both Cocaine AND Cola (kola) nut in the actual drink. You drank to get stoned and it was highly addictive. The old man used to tell of days when they went to buy a "dope" at the corner store. They also smoked weed, and since both weed and cigarettes were hand rolled, it was much less obvious. Not sure when the bong was invented but I get the impression it was not back then.
Sweet Tea was not necessarily sweet tea back in the day. Often it would have been improper for proper southern ladies to drink and it is no coincidence that bourbon and tea can be very similar in color. Again, during Prohibition, if some ladies were sipping sweet tea, there is a good probability it was also bourbon. I know this was still happening in the south in the 50's and 60's because I was drinking some of that sweet tea with certain southern ladies. As for lemonade, it was a cover for white lightning the same way tea was for bourbon.
If you see great aunt Thelma Sue in an old grainy B&W pick on the porch with a great big smile, odds are good she was stoned on cocaine laced cola's or buzzed on bourbon laced tea. I have had consumed my share of lemonade flavored white lightning and it is damn good.
Southern Ladies can hold their liquor and their likker pretty well
Southern Men don't write naughty words on walls they can't spell
As for carbonated beverages in the SEC (subject to updates)
<> Club Soda - you are probably my age or older if you grew up drinking this
<> Coke - (pronounced koh cola, not coke or coke cola) is what you drank in GA and similar places in the south
<> RC Cola - what real southerner's drank and also glazed city hams with (country hams need no such glaze)
<> Pepsi - some yankee crap nobody drank when I was a kid
<> Ale 8 - 3 times the caffeine and twice the sugar of the next carbonated drink in the USA
(consumed in KY with slaw dogs)
<> Mountain Dew - Ale 8 for folks in TN (also consumed with slaw dogs)
<> Vernors - Ale 8 for folks north of the Ohio Ocean (but not with slaw dogs)
<> ???? - The orange stuff you drank in TN in the 60's and 70's that probably got pulled for causing cancer
<> ???? - similar to the orange stuff but red, probably caused cancer too
<> Root Beer - tasty beverage you drank in the south (especially LA) that like real Coke has been deformed
(both Coke and most things now called Root Beer are just caramelized fake sugar water)
<> Dr Pepper - Waco has a new stadium shaped like a toilet, no wonder this tastes like arse
(Ken Starr is in Waco and probably knows what arse tastes like so this is no real surprise)
(on a related note, Waco gave us Baylor, Ken Starr, Dr Pepper, and David Koresh - what good ever come out of Waco?)
<> Tab - what strippers in go go boots drank in the 60's - 70's (was surprised to see they still made it)
<> Purple Drank - combine dope and carbonation, no wonder this is popular in the south. Dr Pemberton must be smiling in heaven seeing the old band getting back together.
Sadly there were lots of good local beverages that have all disappeared in the modern age of carbonated beverages. If you are addicted to any of them it is sad as it just means you are addicted to the shadow of their former selves. Whoever thought artificial flavors in drinks was a good thing should be drawn and quartered.
bourbon - what you shoot out of her navel
tequila - what you shoot out of her navel after licking squeezed limes off her chest
This is the only correct combination of bourbon and coke!
Bourbon was created to stand on it's own. It was not until until Prohibition that mixed drinks became the rage. This was due to real distilleries being shut down and the replacement booze being so bad you had to mix it with something to get it down your throat.
As for those saying snorting coke is a bad thing, yet drink Coke Cola, you are unaware of the past. In the early days, Coke had both Cocaine AND Cola (kola) nut in the actual drink. You drank to get stoned and it was highly addictive. The old man used to tell of days when they went to buy a "dope" at the corner store. They also smoked weed, and since both weed and cigarettes were hand rolled, it was much less obvious. Not sure when the bong was invented but I get the impression it was not back then.
Sweet Tea was not necessarily sweet tea back in the day. Often it would have been improper for proper southern ladies to drink and it is no coincidence that bourbon and tea can be very similar in color. Again, during Prohibition, if some ladies were sipping sweet tea, there is a good probability it was also bourbon. I know this was still happening in the south in the 50's and 60's because I was drinking some of that sweet tea with certain southern ladies. As for lemonade, it was a cover for white lightning the same way tea was for bourbon.
If you see great aunt Thelma Sue in an old grainy B&W pick on the porch with a great big smile, odds are good she was stoned on cocaine laced cola's or buzzed on bourbon laced tea. I have had consumed my share of lemonade flavored white lightning and it is damn good.
Southern Ladies can hold their liquor and their likker pretty well
Southern Men don't write naughty words on walls they can't spell
As for carbonated beverages in the SEC (subject to updates)
<> Club Soda - you are probably my age or older if you grew up drinking this
<> Coke - (pronounced koh cola, not coke or coke cola) is what you drank in GA and similar places in the south
<> RC Cola - what real southerner's drank and also glazed city hams with (country hams need no such glaze)
<> Pepsi - some yankee crap nobody drank when I was a kid
<> Ale 8 - 3 times the caffeine and twice the sugar of the next carbonated drink in the USA
(consumed in KY with slaw dogs)
<> Mountain Dew - Ale 8 for folks in TN (also consumed with slaw dogs)
<> Vernors - Ale 8 for folks north of the Ohio Ocean (but not with slaw dogs)
<> ???? - The orange stuff you drank in TN in the 60's and 70's that probably got pulled for causing cancer
<> ???? - similar to the orange stuff but red, probably caused cancer too
<> Root Beer - tasty beverage you drank in the south (especially LA) that like real Coke has been deformed
(both Coke and most things now called Root Beer are just caramelized fake sugar water)
<> Dr Pepper - Waco has a new stadium shaped like a toilet, no wonder this tastes like arse
(Ken Starr is in Waco and probably knows what arse tastes like so this is no real surprise)
(on a related note, Waco gave us Baylor, Ken Starr, Dr Pepper, and David Koresh - what good ever come out of Waco?)
<> Tab - what strippers in go go boots drank in the 60's - 70's (was surprised to see they still made it)
<> Purple Drank - combine dope and carbonation, no wonder this is popular in the south. Dr Pemberton must be smiling in heaven seeing the old band getting back together.
Sadly there were lots of good local beverages that have all disappeared in the modern age of carbonated beverages. If you are addicted to any of them it is sad as it just means you are addicted to the shadow of their former selves. Whoever thought artificial flavors in drinks was a good thing should be drawn and quartered.
8
Posted on 6/4/15 at 10:49 pm to Cheese Grits
Wut
Posted on 6/4/15 at 10:51 pm to Cheese Grits
No, you snort the coke off her titties. You just have put it in a pile instead of a line.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 12:06 am to Cheese Grits
Posted on 6/5/15 at 6:35 am to Cheese Grits
Uparrow for you Cheese. I enjoyed that.
What about grape, orange and peach Nehi?
What about Crush?
What about Cheerwine?
What about Royal Crown? Remember the Nancy Sinatra commercials?
What about grape, orange and peach Nehi?
What about Crush?
What about Cheerwine?
What about Royal Crown? Remember the Nancy Sinatra commercials?
Posted on 6/5/15 at 6:36 am to Cheese Grits
No cheerwine? That stuff is damn good.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 7:21 am to Dawg in Beaumont
Posted on 6/5/15 at 7:56 am to scrooster
quote:
What about Royal Crown?
RC Cola is in the OP = Royal Crown. When I was younger folks said "RC and MP please". Did folks actually say Royal Crown where you grew up?
quote:
What about Cheerwine?
Cheerwine was one of the locals I mentioned in the OP as a local. What description would you like me to add in the OP for it? I think the roots of Cheerwine were in KY but I could be mistaken. I put Ale 8 (a KY local) mainly because of the caffeine and sugar content being so high, and to provide the slaw dog comments. I was trying to make some of these funny so if you want me to add a funny quip, what would you like me to say?
quote:
What about grape, orange and peach Nehi?
I always thought of them as being more under the RC umbrella. The grape and orange were meh, but the peach was not bad. If you want me to add a funny blurb for each, tell me what you want to add. I always liked that RC's roots were in root beer and ginger beer (ale) which really were the best beverages.
quote:
What about Crush?
I thought at first that was what they drank in TN in the 60's and 70's but you could actually drink Crush and not get sick after drinking it. The orange and red stuff I was thinking about would actually make you feel sick if you drank more than 1 or 2. The red version I feel probably had the red dye #3 that was later proven to cause cancer, and may be why it vanished.
quote:
Nancy Sinatra
In my mind it was Nancy Sinatra who got the whole go go boot thing going.
Classic 60's "helmet hair"
Kids today see movies and don't realize the her music is in the background of modern flicks. The one above is in Full Metal Jacket and the "me so horny" scene if memory serves.
Seems I have heard this one this in the background in a few modern movies as well.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 8:05 am to Cheese Grits
Bang Bang was on the Kill Bill soundtrack.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 8:07 am to Person of interest
quote:
Bang Bang was on the Kill Bill soundtrack.
Was Robert Downey in that? Seems I remember seeing one with Downey and heard Bang Bang in the background.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 8:10 am to Cheese Grits
Barqs?
Posted on 6/5/15 at 8:22 am to cardboardboxer
quote:
Barqs?
Barq's was great when I was young and it was still a Root Beer. It was from LA and had an excellent taste and bite to it. Sadly it was purchased by Coke, and they ruined it. See my comment about Root Beers in the OP and Barq's was one of the great brands that fell under corporate ownership. It tastes like crap now and is sad.
It really is hard to get an actual root beer anymore unless you know somebody who makes their own.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 8:31 am to Cheese Grits
quote:
It really is hard to get an actual root beer anymore unless you know somebody who makes their own.
Several craft beer breweries do a root beer. Abita is probably the most recognizable in the South, and there's is decent enough.
Sprecher Root Beer is the bee's knees. They also make a hard root beer that's like 7% ABV. They're cherry cola is really good as well.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 9:05 am to The Spleen
quote:
Abita is probably the most recognizable in the South
They have recently fallen to the carmel colored water status. At least I think they use cane instead of the fake sugar. The bigger issue is the flavor. So many Root Beers taste no more like Root Beer. Just like Twizzlers don't taste like real licorice and fake vanilla is a pale imitator of real vanilla. Big corporations are dumbing down our taste buds to just salt, sugar, and fake flavors.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 9:47 am to Cheese Grits
quote:
Bang Bang was on the Kill Bill soundtrack.
Was Robert Downey in that? Seems I remember seeing one with Downey and heard Bang Bang in the background.
No, he wasn't.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 9:50 am to Cheese Grits
quote:
Barq's was great when I was young and it was still a Root Beer. It was from LA and had an excellent taste and bite to it. Sadly it was purchased by Coke, and they ruined it. See my comment about Root Beers in the OP and Barq's was one of the great brands that fell under corporate ownership. It tastes like crap now and is sad.
Damn that sucks.
This is why I mostly drink tea and beer.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 12:30 pm to cardboardboxer
Pop Rouge! Not sure if they still make that though....
Posted on 6/5/15 at 5:56 pm to Cheese Grits
quote:
Cheerwine was one of the locals I mentioned in the OP as a local. What description would you like me to add in the OP for it? I think the roots of Cheerwine were in KY but I could be mistaken. I put Ale 8 (a KY local) mainly because of the caffeine and sugar content being so high, and to provide the slaw dog comments. I was trying to make some of these funny so if you want me to add a funny quip, what would you like me to say?
North Carolina, actually, but close enough. Cheerwine, I've discovered, is a love it or hate it proposition. If you ever wondered what your cherry cough syrup would taste like if it was a refreshing carbonated beverage, just try Cheerwine.
Posted on 6/5/15 at 6:06 pm to Cheese Grits
quote:
Was Robert Downey in that? Seems I remember seeing one with Downey and heard Bang Bang in the background.
He was in "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang"
Posted on 6/5/15 at 6:33 pm to Cheese Grits
quote:
So many Root Beers taste no more like Root Beer
True, but if can find a BJ'S Brew house restaurant they make their own and it's real root beer and real creme soda
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