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Anyone have any good drunk stories?
Posted on 5/6/16 at 9:39 am
Posted on 5/6/16 at 9:39 am
Been a bit of a slow morning on tRant. Anyone have any funny stories after having a few too many?
20
Posted on 5/6/16 at 9:47 am to Walker_Abel
I've got a few doozies. I'll have to wait until I can get to the computer tho. My honeymoon adventure is a classic
Posted on 5/6/16 at 9:51 am to Walker_Abel
Sure, 4 years at any SEC school will probably lead to some good ones.
Sadly I can't share my best one. I'll try to think of some good ones later.
Sadly I can't share my best one. I'll try to think of some good ones later.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 11:19 am to Walker_Abel
Not too many yet
But the "best" one I have so far was after prom my senior year. We had an after party and my girlfriend at the time wound up driving my car to her house. And told me bye and left me in my passengers seat still messed up out of my mind. Her parents were very strict. So I texted her asking if I could come inside to pee. So she unlocked the front door and I stumbled in, peed and then laid down on the sofa. And I only got about 30 minutes of sleep in before I felt someone shaking my shoulder and asking what the frick I was doing. And my vision was blurry. I didn't even remember where I was or how I got there. So I didn't say anything and he started shaking me and repeated his question. And that's when I became aware of the situation. It was her step dad and he was up early (it was 4 am) to go on the tug boat for the week. And I started apologizing and walked out in just a button up shirt and underwear (no clue where my pants were). So I drove to a McDonald's close by and slept a little bit more in my car. I woke up around 6 am and drove home... And of course I get pulled over for going 63 in a 55 by a state trooper. At this point I was pretty sober, but I was still just in my shirt and underwear. No shoes or anything. I explained my situation and he said his daughter went to school with my girlfriend. So he just let me go. I finally got home and when I walked in, my mom, dad, brother and god child were in the living room and I didn't say a word. I just walked to my room and slept the rest of the day.
My girlfriend found my pants when she woke up and came and picked up my tux and everything to bring back to Men's Wearhouse for me
She was pretty pissed about having to drive herself home and her stepdad finding me on the sofa.
TL;DR
Prom after party was fun. Girlfriends step dad almost killed me because I accidentally slept there. Lost my pants and got pulled over.
Obligatory "cool story bro"; "bullshite"; "pics or it didn't happen"
But the "best" one I have so far was after prom my senior year. We had an after party and my girlfriend at the time wound up driving my car to her house. And told me bye and left me in my passengers seat still messed up out of my mind. Her parents were very strict. So I texted her asking if I could come inside to pee. So she unlocked the front door and I stumbled in, peed and then laid down on the sofa. And I only got about 30 minutes of sleep in before I felt someone shaking my shoulder and asking what the frick I was doing. And my vision was blurry. I didn't even remember where I was or how I got there. So I didn't say anything and he started shaking me and repeated his question. And that's when I became aware of the situation. It was her step dad and he was up early (it was 4 am) to go on the tug boat for the week. And I started apologizing and walked out in just a button up shirt and underwear (no clue where my pants were). So I drove to a McDonald's close by and slept a little bit more in my car. I woke up around 6 am and drove home... And of course I get pulled over for going 63 in a 55 by a state trooper. At this point I was pretty sober, but I was still just in my shirt and underwear. No shoes or anything. I explained my situation and he said his daughter went to school with my girlfriend. So he just let me go. I finally got home and when I walked in, my mom, dad, brother and god child were in the living room and I didn't say a word. I just walked to my room and slept the rest of the day.
My girlfriend found my pants when she woke up and came and picked up my tux and everything to bring back to Men's Wearhouse for me
She was pretty pissed about having to drive herself home and her stepdad finding me on the sofa.
TL;DR
Prom after party was fun. Girlfriends step dad almost killed me because I accidentally slept there. Lost my pants and got pulled over.
Obligatory "cool story bro"; "bullshite"; "pics or it didn't happen"
This post was edited on 5/6/16 at 11:21 am
Posted on 5/6/16 at 11:27 am to Walker_Abel
I think I mentioned it before on this site, but....
My college friends and I had a great tailgate. We would have live music, at a heavily trafficked location, and our tailgate was sponsored by a bar in Columbia (we got free kegs as long as we flew the bar's flag at the tailgate.)
SC played NCState to open the season and ESPN was in town. We saw the ESPN buses roll into the stadium. Everybody was getting hammered, we went to the game, and then everyone went back to the bar that sponsored tailgate afterwards.
It was a little after midnight, the bar was packed, MC Hammer came on the speakers and the girl bartender said "I'm going to do my MC Hammer dance on this bar."
I said, "hold on, I'm going to film this." So I bust out my old Nextel flip phone and start to record. She's dancing, people are having fun with it, when she starts screaming, "I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT, I KNEW Y'ALL WERE COMING HERE!" while she was looking at the front door of the bar.
So I pan left and sure enough it was ESPN's Craig James, Jesse Palmer and about 10 other ESPN crew guys walking in the door. They come up to the bar and Jesse says, "I saw your flag at the tailgate and it looked like a good time, so we decided to come up here."
We proceeded to do jager bombs with the ESPN guys. Jesse talked about how much he respected Spurrier. Craig James was pretty reserved (I don't know if he killed any hookers that night,) and one of the guys in the bar went outside to call people to tell them that ESPN was at the bar. Well when he was calling people outside, he had to piss, so he did so...right on an unmarked cop car with a cop sitting inside the car....
Yeah, so he got arrested.....
We partied with ESPN crew some more, a lot of people showed up, the ESPN crew left, and then my brother and I went to see about getting the guy out of jail.
My college friends and I had a great tailgate. We would have live music, at a heavily trafficked location, and our tailgate was sponsored by a bar in Columbia (we got free kegs as long as we flew the bar's flag at the tailgate.)
SC played NCState to open the season and ESPN was in town. We saw the ESPN buses roll into the stadium. Everybody was getting hammered, we went to the game, and then everyone went back to the bar that sponsored tailgate afterwards.
It was a little after midnight, the bar was packed, MC Hammer came on the speakers and the girl bartender said "I'm going to do my MC Hammer dance on this bar."
I said, "hold on, I'm going to film this." So I bust out my old Nextel flip phone and start to record. She's dancing, people are having fun with it, when she starts screaming, "I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT, I KNEW Y'ALL WERE COMING HERE!" while she was looking at the front door of the bar.
So I pan left and sure enough it was ESPN's Craig James, Jesse Palmer and about 10 other ESPN crew guys walking in the door. They come up to the bar and Jesse says, "I saw your flag at the tailgate and it looked like a good time, so we decided to come up here."
We proceeded to do jager bombs with the ESPN guys. Jesse talked about how much he respected Spurrier. Craig James was pretty reserved (I don't know if he killed any hookers that night,) and one of the guys in the bar went outside to call people to tell them that ESPN was at the bar. Well when he was calling people outside, he had to piss, so he did so...right on an unmarked cop car with a cop sitting inside the car....
Yeah, so he got arrested.....
We partied with ESPN crew some more, a lot of people showed up, the ESPN crew left, and then my brother and I went to see about getting the guy out of jail.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 11:31 am to Walker_Abel
Where to start...
Posted on 5/6/16 at 11:50 am to CockInYourEar
quote:
Craig James was pretty reserved (I don't know if he killed any hookers that night,)
Posted on 5/6/16 at 12:30 pm to Walker_Abel
Short version.
Lost my car.
Lost my credit card after running up a $150 tab. (Wrote a $500 tip that thankfully the bar didn't process)
Woke up on the front porch of a house that I didn't know who lived there.
Was soaking wet. (Turned out it was dew combined with my pee)
Apparently got in a fight with somebody. Don't remember.
Apparently a girl I knew kissed me in front of her boyfriend. Interestingly he was not the guy I got in a fight with.
Literally walked all the way across Oxford and the campus to get to my house. It's really big when you have to walk it in 95 degree temperatures.
Lost my car.
Lost my credit card after running up a $150 tab. (Wrote a $500 tip that thankfully the bar didn't process)
Woke up on the front porch of a house that I didn't know who lived there.
Was soaking wet. (Turned out it was dew combined with my pee)
Apparently got in a fight with somebody. Don't remember.
Apparently a girl I knew kissed me in front of her boyfriend. Interestingly he was not the guy I got in a fight with.
Literally walked all the way across Oxford and the campus to get to my house. It's really big when you have to walk it in 95 degree temperatures.
This post was edited on 5/6/16 at 12:31 pm
Posted on 5/6/16 at 1:15 pm to Walker_Abel
Several. You weren't very good at college or drinking if you don't have any good drunk stories.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 1:45 pm to The Spleen
I wish I could go to LSU or SELU just for a semester. I've been up there several times, but I'm going to a community college right now (2 semesters to go 
)
But the several times I've gone make me regret staying home for school
You know you had a goodnight when you start off in Hammond then wake up in Morgan city the next day without your car or friends and you have no clue how you got there
) But the several times I've gone make me regret staying home for school
You know you had a goodnight when you start off in Hammond then wake up in Morgan city the next day without your car or friends and you have no clue how you got there
Posted on 5/6/16 at 2:00 pm to SmoothOperator96
Waking up in the same bed as a friend's aunt makes for a pretty good drunken story as well. Best I can remember, it was my friend's graduation party at our house and everyone was pretty drunk. His aunt had just recently divorced and went pretty hard in the paint and passed out. Someone carried her to my bedroom for some reason and put her in my bed. I came to bed a few hours later really drunk and noticed someone in the bed, but didn't check to see who it was before climbing in and passing out myself. It was a pretty awkward few minutes when we woke up and tried to piece together the prior night and how we ended up in the same bed. Even though she was still in her clothes from the night before and nothing happened between us, she was still pretty mortified.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 2:50 pm to The Spleen
quote:
Waking up in the same bed as a friend's aunt makes for a pretty good drunken story as well. Best I can remember, it was my friend's graduation party at our house and everyone was pretty drunk. His aunt had just recently divorced and went pretty hard in the paint and passed out. Someone carried her to my bedroom for some reason and put her in my bed. I came to bed a few hours later really drunk and noticed someone in the bed, but didn't check to see who it was before climbing in and passing out myself. It was a pretty awkward few minutes when we woke up and tried to piece together the prior night and how we ended up in the same bed. Even though she was still in her clothes from the night before and nothing happened between us, she was still pretty mortified.
Man, this story had so much potential. Horrible ending
Posted on 5/6/16 at 3:45 pm to SmoothOperator96
quote:
Not too many yet
But the "best" one I have so far was after prom my senior year. We had an after party and my girlfriend at the time wound up driving my car to her house. And told me bye and left me in my passengers seat still messed up out of my mind. Her parents were very strict. So I texted her asking if I could come inside to pee. So she unlocked the front door and I stumbled in, peed and then laid down on the sofa. And I only got about 30 minutes of sleep in before I felt someone shaking my shoulder and asking what the frick I was doing. And my vision was blurry. I didn't even remember where I was or how I got there. So I didn't say anything and he started shaking me and repeated his question. And that's when I became aware of the situation. It was her step dad and he was up early (it was 4 am) to go on the tug boat for the week. And I started apologizing and walked out in just a button up shirt and underwear (no clue where my pants were). So I drove to a McDonald's close by and slept a little bit more in my car. I woke up around 6 am and drove home... And of course I get pulled over for going 63 in a 55 by a state trooper. At this point I was pretty sober, but I was still just in my shirt and underwear. No shoes or anything. I explained my situation and he said his daughter went to school with my girlfriend. So he just let me go. I finally got home and when I walked in, my mom, dad, brother and god child were in the living room and I didn't say a word. I just walked to my room and slept the rest of the day.
My girlfriend found my pants when she woke up and came and picked up my tux and everything to bring back to Men's Wearhouse for me
She was pretty pissed about having to drive herself home and her stepdad finding me on the sofa.
TL;DR
Prom after party was fun. Girlfriends step dad almost killed me because I accidentally slept there. Lost my pants and got pulled over.
Obligatory "cool story bro"; "bullshite"; "pics or it didn't happen"
That story was pretty boring.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 4:02 pm to Vols&Shaft83
quote:
Man, this story had so much potential. Horrible ending
I know. I guess the most scandalous thing that happened was I was in my boxers and had raging morning wood when I woke up. She just kept asking why I was in the bed with her, and I kept telling her it was my bed and asking her why she was in it. I kind of positioned myself so she'd see my morning wood in hopes she might try something because I certainly wasn't going to try, but she never did. I eventually grabbed a blanket and went out and laid on the couch to give the appearance I slept there, but she's the one that told my friend what happened. He still gives me shite over it.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 4:13 pm to TeLeFaWx
Went gambling in Tunica. I drank to hard and to fast.
Went to the room early(left wifey down on the gambling floor). I went right to sleep. I woke up in the wee hours of the morning. I had to pee really bad. I noticed wifey was in the bed so all was well. We always leave the bathroom closet door closed but we also always leave the bathroom light on. So I headed toward the little crack of light at the bottom of the door. I'm wearing nothing but my drawers. I open the door and close it behind me. That's when I discovered I was in the hotel corridor. Guess what's now locked......you guessed it. Did I mention that wifey is an incredibly hard sleeper? especially when she's been drinking too. Well there I was. Knuckles damn near bleeding from beating on the door & not sure what to do next. So....off I go to the elevator to head to the front desk. Nah....I can't do that. So.....I turn and head to the stairwell. Where am I going?.....So....It's back to the elevator.....nope I can't do it....Stand next to the door for what seemed like hours. Finally wifey got to missing me and opened the door. As soon as she opened it I was standing right in her face and said......"Is this room 2134"? She damn near choked me to death.
Went to the room early(left wifey down on the gambling floor). I went right to sleep. I woke up in the wee hours of the morning. I had to pee really bad. I noticed wifey was in the bed so all was well. We always leave the bathroom closet door closed but we also always leave the bathroom light on. So I headed toward the little crack of light at the bottom of the door. I'm wearing nothing but my drawers. I open the door and close it behind me. That's when I discovered I was in the hotel corridor. Guess what's now locked......you guessed it. Did I mention that wifey is an incredibly hard sleeper? especially when she's been drinking too. Well there I was. Knuckles damn near bleeding from beating on the door & not sure what to do next. So....off I go to the elevator to head to the front desk. Nah....I can't do that. So.....I turn and head to the stairwell. Where am I going?.....So....It's back to the elevator.....nope I can't do it....Stand next to the door for what seemed like hours. Finally wifey got to missing me and opened the door. As soon as she opened it I was standing right in her face and said......"Is this room 2134"? She damn near choked me to death.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 5:08 pm to Walker_Abel
Got into a scuffle with the boyfriend of a girl I was dancing with at the old Sidetrack here in Tuscaloosa. He pulled wanted to fight but the bouncers interviened. Cops were called (I was underage) and I ran out the back door with cops in pursuit. Ended up sleeping in the Hannah House donation box in back parking lot. Climbed in and covered myself up with clothes and passed out. Woke up at 6:30 in the morning when a train was rolling past. Climbed out the little window of the donation box and the guy driving the truck that was emptying the dumpster gave me a thumps up.
Second one was when I got into a fight at Harrys with 2 dwarves. Let me tell you, those guys might be small but they are strong. Knocked the first one out cold, and the other one climbed up on a car and jumped on my back. I had one hell of a time getting that little bastard off me. That was when I realized I needed to chill out and stay out of bars for a while....
Second one was when I got into a fight at Harrys with 2 dwarves. Let me tell you, those guys might be small but they are strong. Knocked the first one out cold, and the other one climbed up on a car and jumped on my back. I had one hell of a time getting that little bastard off me. That was when I realized I needed to chill out and stay out of bars for a while....
Posted on 5/6/16 at 7:00 pm to alphaandomega
quote:
. Ended up sleeping in the Hannah House donation box in back parking lot. Climbed in and covered myself up with clothes and passed out.
This makes my skin craw. Ugh, I can't imagine sleeping in a fricking hannah home box.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 7:04 pm to Walker_Abel
About 20 years ago I had a five hour layover in Houston. Big arse airport and about every couple hundred yards they have a restaurant/bar and each one looks the same. So I sit at the bar and get plastered with my garmat bag hanging on the chair beside me (this was before carry on restrictions). After awhile I told the bartender I was going to the bathroom please watch my bag and my drink, which he was fine with. So I stagger my drunk arse to the bathroom and piss like a race horse then stagger my drunk arse back to find my luggage and drink are gone. So I jump the bartenders arse and he's like wtf are you talking about. I'm like "mother f^^%er Im talking about my luggage and drink you said you would f^^&%ing watch while I went to piss". Just then I realized I went back to the wrong bar.
Posted on 5/6/16 at 7:16 pm to Buddy2012
quote:
About 20 years ago I had a five hour layover in Houston. Big arse airport and about every couple hundred yards they have a restaurant/bar and each one looks the same. So I sit at the bar and get plastered with my garmat bag hanging on the chair beside me (this was before carry on restrictions). After awhile I told the bartender I was going to the bathroom please watch my bag and my drink, which he was fine with. So I stagger my drunk arse to the bathroom and piss like a race horse then stagger my drunk arse back to find my luggage and drink are gone. So I jump the bartenders arse and he's like wtf are you talking about. I'm like "mother f^^%er Im talking about my luggage and drink you said you would f^^&%ing watch while I went to piss". Just then I realized I went back to the wrong bar.
What did you do when you realized?
Posted on 5/6/16 at 7:37 pm to Funky Tide 8
Too many stories to tell. One of them I was at a Panama City club when many of the Louisiana schools were on break. I walked the beaches with everclear all day and pretty much barely got into the bar only because my brother convinced the bouncer he would look after me. Turns out though, he left and I was feeling up some chick and her friend asked my friend "he is touchy-feely isn't he?" My friend Luke then tells me "dude, that's a guy"( it wasn't) and then, according to them, I said "ohh okay" and walked off. I have no clue what happened next but I was told the next morning that I was kicked out of the club. To make matters worst because my crew pretty much hated me, my brother( which was initially my keeper but ended up as drunk as I was) rode in the backseat with me and we started slapping our DD( my best friend really) while he was driving and he wrecked my car. To finish off a great night for me, I ended up throwing up rainbow colors on the beach and passing out at the Chateau. The next day, I woke up at noon went down to the pool and started drinking again.
And I am just one example of why PCB wants to go dry.
And I am just one example of why PCB wants to go dry.
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