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WTF South? Really? And of all Places...Tuscaloosa!
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:20 pm
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:20 pm
pulled this off of a prominant food critic website. WTF south?
"...I stood in front of (Tuscaloosa burger joint) staring at their old rusted 1950s metal sign. A food critic friend in Chattanooga, TN had told me about this restaurant. He said, "If you don't stop at (burger joint) in Tuscaloosa to sample their famous southern burgster, you will have wasted your trip to New Orleans because you will have passed by the best burger the south has to offer!"
Needless to say my anticipation was sky high!
I walked into (burger joint), sat down at the bar, and I ordered the southern burgster - the burger of the south. Within five minutes, a pretty waitress with a sexy southern drawl slid a greasy plate in front of me and said, "Hur ya go, mister! Hope ya enjoy the burgster. Woodja like catchip with dat?"
I declined the "catchip" and smiled. Was she flirting with me? Anyhow, back to the burger.
The burger was a heaping mess of meat and cheese about 4 inches tall. The bun had ceased being a bun a long time ago, rather it had essentially become a grease sponge. I could tell that this burger was going to be incredible! I opened my mouth, sunk my teeth into the greasy mess, and I began to delightfully chew.
However, as I chewed the greasy mess, my delight quickly turned to disgust because something was amiss! Something didn't taste right. The hot greasy mess tasted, well, rotten!
I discretely spit my half chewed food into a napkin and began to look more closely at the burger. I noticed something that I'd never seen on a burger before; a thick fatty slice of ham was nestled between two burger patties .
I beckoned for the waitress to assist me.
"Miss! Can I speak to you for a moment? I just noticed that there is a thick slice of ham on my burger. I didn't order the burger that way. Can you tell me why a thick slice of ham is on my burger?"
The waitress looked puzzled and replied, "Well, sir, that's how hamburgers are made! It woodin' be a hamburger without tha ham! It wood be just a burger."
I wondered for what seemed like an incredibly long moment if she was joking with me, until a patron sitting next to me said, "You not hadda hamburger patty witha slice a ham befur? Can't getta better burger in tha entur country than this one right that thur."
I paid the waitress and left the restaurant. The south's most famous hamburger was an incredibly awful bust."
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WTF south? Really? You put slices of ham on hamburgers? The name hamburger is not to be taken literally!
"...I stood in front of (Tuscaloosa burger joint) staring at their old rusted 1950s metal sign. A food critic friend in Chattanooga, TN had told me about this restaurant. He said, "If you don't stop at (burger joint) in Tuscaloosa to sample their famous southern burgster, you will have wasted your trip to New Orleans because you will have passed by the best burger the south has to offer!"
Needless to say my anticipation was sky high!
I walked into (burger joint), sat down at the bar, and I ordered the southern burgster - the burger of the south. Within five minutes, a pretty waitress with a sexy southern drawl slid a greasy plate in front of me and said, "Hur ya go, mister! Hope ya enjoy the burgster. Woodja like catchip with dat?"
I declined the "catchip" and smiled. Was she flirting with me? Anyhow, back to the burger.
The burger was a heaping mess of meat and cheese about 4 inches tall. The bun had ceased being a bun a long time ago, rather it had essentially become a grease sponge. I could tell that this burger was going to be incredible! I opened my mouth, sunk my teeth into the greasy mess, and I began to delightfully chew.
However, as I chewed the greasy mess, my delight quickly turned to disgust because something was amiss! Something didn't taste right. The hot greasy mess tasted, well, rotten!
I discretely spit my half chewed food into a napkin and began to look more closely at the burger. I noticed something that I'd never seen on a burger before; a thick fatty slice of ham was nestled between two burger patties .
I beckoned for the waitress to assist me.
"Miss! Can I speak to you for a moment? I just noticed that there is a thick slice of ham on my burger. I didn't order the burger that way. Can you tell me why a thick slice of ham is on my burger?"
The waitress looked puzzled and replied, "Well, sir, that's how hamburgers are made! It woodin' be a hamburger without tha ham! It wood be just a burger."
I wondered for what seemed like an incredibly long moment if she was joking with me, until a patron sitting next to me said, "You not hadda hamburger patty witha slice a ham befur? Can't getta better burger in tha entur country than this one right that thur."
I paid the waitress and left the restaurant. The south's most famous hamburger was an incredibly awful bust."
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WTF south? Really? You put slices of ham on hamburgers? The name hamburger is not to be taken literally!
This post was edited on 6/6/13 at 8:10 pm
29
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:22 pm to mizzoukills
Goddammit kills you're better than this.
And a slice of ham on a burger is good. It's not a Southern thing, but seriously try it.
And a slice of ham on a burger is good. It's not a Southern thing, but seriously try it.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:24 pm to mizzoukills
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:24 pm to mizzoukills
no you fool, we don't put ham on our hamburgers
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:24 pm to mizzoukills
Those people are retarded.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:25 pm to mizzoukills
Too bad the douchebag who wrote the article didn't choke on the ham.....
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:25 pm to mizzoukills
Literally never had or seen a place that puts ham on a burger.
But whatever, I'll take this guy's word for it.
But whatever, I'll take this guy's word for it.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:25 pm to mizzoukills
Any mention of the name of the place? Link?
I've eaten many of burgers in my days in Ttown, but I've never had a burger in my life that hand ham in the meat.
I've eaten many of burgers in my days in Ttown, but I've never had a burger in my life that hand ham in the meat.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:25 pm to dkreller
quote:
Those people are retarded.
Sounds like it. I guess the Bible isn't the only thing that they take literally...
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:26 pm to mizzoukills
Why do you feel as if someone from Missouri can make fun of anywhere else? Too boring to be true yankees, and not interesting enough to be true southerners. It's like your state is caught in the entropy of indistinguishable blah. The only thing you get points for is being the birthplace of Sam Clemens, who surpassed being from your state quite well. Listen to him: " In America there is San Francisco and New Orleans-everywhere else is Cleveland. "
This post was edited on 6/6/13 at 4:27 pm
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:26 pm to mizzoukills
Needed thread was needed
Come on killz
Come on killz
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:26 pm to mizzoukills
You can't tell when someone obviously made up a story to make fun of the south?
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:27 pm to mizzoukills
this really is a terrible thread.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:27 pm to genro
quote:
You can't tell when someone obviously made up a story to make fun of the south?
Considering the source, I don't believe that it is made up. I believe it!
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:28 pm to mizzoukills
Has to be one of the worst post I have ever read. I like the jabbin', but geez, this is awful.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:28 pm to mizzoukills
I like your title "Wtf south", as in that's how we do it.
Again, can we get a name of this place.
Again, can we get a name of this place.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:28 pm to mizzoukills
Didn't read all that shite.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:29 pm to mizzoukills
You missed hitting the OT button.
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:29 pm to mizzoukills
Posted on 6/6/13 at 4:30 pm to mizzoukills
quote:
Considering the source
We don't know the source you tweeked out meth head. Where is it????
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